Nullen

Published 20 September 2013  |  
The day my son Nullen was born on the 30 December 2010, was the best day of my life. I always wanted to be a mother and always wanted a little boy, and God answered my prayers! It wasn't straight forward in any sense of the word.

Every time I look at Nullen I feel how much God has blessed me and my husband Eddie.
Getting pregnant was hard and disappointing every month when we didn't conceive, Eddie really wanted a baby and I wanted it more. After trying for over a year we gave up.

We already knew that God brought us together. Eddie asked me marry him and we were so thankful to God for answering our prayers even much so that in some sense we totally forgot him then.

Throughout that year of failing to conceive we totally forgot to turn to the one person that could actually make it happen – God. We were too wound up about thinking there was something wrong with our bodies and even being upset with God after negative pregnancy tests.

Why couldn't God just give us what we wanted? Why was he being so mean to us? What have we done wrong? All these thoughts we were thinking in our minds and yet we didn't stop to talk to God about it, we didn't take a minute to pray, the furthest thing in our minds was picking up a bible and reading Gods word.

Then we gave up, didn't talk about having a baby or talk about what medical tests we could do to see if there was a problem.

Eventually we were happy again, we moved away from Eddie's family and closer to my family on the Fraser coast, we stuck to ourselves and were enjoying being a couple and planning ahead. We were not married and I looked forward to our wedding day.

One day I was looking through a wedding magazine and saw a bride who was pregnant, she looked beautiful she was glowing, then the thoughts of having a bub came back all the wishing and wanting came back all in that moment and then I tried something I have never done for a while - I prayed.

A need to pray

As I was praying I had an overwhelming feeling come over me I didn't really know what it was but it was good, I prayed and prayed and the feeling was so good that I didn't want to stop praying.

Then I prayed everyday from then on, even the thoughts in my head were constantly talking to God. A couple months went by and I was so ill, everyday I was spewing and feeling just down right sick, I actually thought I was dying I was so scared to go to the hospital because I really thought if I did they would give me bad news, so I let it go on for weeks and keep praying and praying that I didn't want to die.

Eventually Eddie forced me to the hospital and they asked if I was pregnant which is a routine thing to ask and I said "no" very insistently and later they took a urine sample, I was hooked up to an IV getting some fluids in my system and the nurse comes back smiling and holding something in her hands.

I then realised it was a pregnancy test just as the nurse said "we done a pregnancy test, do you know what it says?" I answered very confidently "negative" then she smiles and shakes her head "nope its positive" she replies.

I can't believe it, no this can't be right! But it is I realise as she hands me the test to prove it to me, wow I'm really pregnant! Yay! Eddie can't stop smiling and I can't stop smiling, Eddie claims he knew already but wanted to be sure.

I told my nan she was so happy, she even said it was a boy even before we knew it was a boy, because of how bad my morning sickness was. I prayed for a boy, Eddie prayed for a boy because we wanted to name him Nullen which in Eddie's language means "the Sun" or "bright star" and wasn't he ever,

Nullen was born at 10.32pm via emergency C-section, perfect, our bright star, our blessing from the Lord Almighty who made everything and who controls everything.

If you're ever in need its worth taking the time to talk to God and to put your trust and faith in him sometimes its hard to let go and give control to someone else but the Lord is the most trustworthy of anyone, it really is true that anything is possible for him who believes.

Praise the Lord!

Tisha Williams is an indigenous home maker and mother on the Gold Coast / Tweed. He husband Edward is an indigenous painter, training to be a carpenter and teaches their children his language and dream time stories which have parallels in the Bible.

Tisha Williams' previous articles may be viewed at www.pressserviceinternational.org/tisha-williams.html

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